I am flatter than flat @outlander. I have very little energy and zero motivation right now. I am going to watch a rom com called Enough Already.
You did what you had to do at the time, which unfortunately you are paying the price for other's selfishness. Think of not stupid, but lesson learned. I understand it's really hard when you have pressure on both sides and you are being squeezed in the middle. As much as you love your Pop, he unfortunately lacks awareness about the impact his behaviours and attitude have on you. This is very much the case with people getting older, with increasing health concerns and decreasing independence. It's a painful situation and it's often taken out on those closest to them- you.
When I was newly graduated as a nurse, I did a transition year at my local hospital at the time. My first rotation was rehabilitation. I did a lot of the junior work, and that combined with working at a nursing home during my 2nd and 3rd year of studying for nursing, combined into a weakness in my back muscles. Six weeks into my first job I injured my back severly and was off work for 9months. Although I don't suffer frequent pain now, I do occasionally get sciatica and other muscular aches and pains, particularly if I do things the wrong way. So now, if another nurse or patient, want me to help them, and if they can't work with me to maintain safety to both of us, I will refuse. It's just not worth days of horrific pain, limited mobility and loss of function. I will no longer compromise my health.
