im back..... i think

[NikNik]

@outlander 

just focus on this moment - don't look too far into the future - even thinking about tonight. Just focus on right now. As @Anony18 said, we'll be here to sit beside you.

Can I ask what music you were listening to last night - or what you're usually in to?

[outlander]

i was just listening to whatever was in my phone playlist and here was alot so cant really pick a song @NikNik

im trying to focus on now but its the urges- those damn urges- they are my present right now and thats all i can think about and feel and have the urge to do

[Anony18]

you still with us @outlander. Give me a song and we shall listen to it together now 

[NikNik]

That's okay @outlander - urges are thoughts, which you don't need to act on. Here are a few techniques I have heard for others before:

- Visualise yourself putting your thoughts of SH into a box and tape them up and store them on a shelf to deal with later

- Observe and list, 5 things you see, 5 colours you see, 5 things you can hear, 5 things you can smell

- Find an app that does guided meditation or mindfulness (Smiling Mind is a good one), plug in the ear phones and follow the guided activity.

Do any of those sound like something you could try at the moment?

[outlander]

yeah im still here kinda @Anony18@Pepsimax @NikNik

i dont feel ok at all, i want them to stop. i want the pain to stop but at the moment i think thats the only thing stopping me from acting on it again and thats pain from the last night

At the moment  im just watching a movie called Cadet Kelly

[Anony18]

I can feel your pain through the words you are saying @outlander. Wish I had the right words.

Cadet Kelly is the one with HIllary Duff right? Do you like those type of movies? I always enjoyed a cinderella story or rather another cinderella story. The one i liked is Another Cinderella Story: Once upon a song. Love the music! 

[outlander]

Yeah thats the one @Anony18 yeah thry are good i watch many sorts of movies except horror. I dont like horror
Oh yes i have all three of those movies

@NikNik im still extremely embarrassed about what i said in the other thread but removed it. I cant get around it

[Anony18]

Do you just watch at home @outlander or have opportunity to head out to the cinemas? 

[NikNik]

As I said last night @outlander - it's nothing to be embarrassed about - it's a common reaction.
This is quite an open and non-judgemental community, so I don't think anyone thinks any different of you.
Nik

[outlander]

yeah i jsut watch them at home @Anony18

i dont go to the cincemeas unless i take my sisters- they want to go see cars 3 so ill prob take them to see that. i do like cars so might enjoy it myself

@NikNik i know but im still embarrassed being a female makes it weird for me- isnt it only men who do that

hmm Anony18 maybe i should ask you too