what a horrible day

[Former-Member]

Hi @MDT

I'm really sorry to hear how difficult things have been lately. In your last post you asked for help. There are lots of people here who care about you and would like to help. Can you let us know a bit more about what's happening right now and how we might be able to help?

As @Former-Member mentioned, you are welcome to call the SANE helpline. I've also sent you an email with some other numbers you can call for telephone or online support.

Can you let us know how you're going?

Take care @Hamsolo01

[Former-Member]

I just saw your earlier post @MDT. Thank you for letting us know you're ok

[Phoenix_Rising]

Hi @MDT,

I have been following along with your story. I can definitely relate to your struggle around wondering if you have wasted your time at uni. I spent 12 years getting my 4-year degree...only to find I'm pretty much unemployable due to my mental health issues. For all that time people were telling me to "keep going, it will be worth it in the end" and that "no education is ever wasted" and that "your degree will be useful in whatever you do." Yeah...none of that has proven true yet - and I graduated 2 years ago.

At the moment in Australia and other western societies, the higher education sector is in a bit of a muddle. In years gone by, very few people went to uni and thus a degree was highly valued. These days, there are far more people getting a degree than can ever be accommodated in the workplace. This is particularly true for generalist degrees.

I am currently marking some uni papers and the quality of work is so poor, it's making me feel really yuck. Whereas in times past having a degree showed that a person at least had the soft skills of being able to write, engage in critical thinking etc., I don't think even this is the case anymore. I could have happily failed pretty much all of these students, but I would get into trouble if I did that. Hence I have pushed most of them through while personally believing that their work is not up to university standard.

So...I guess what I'm saying is that I can totally understand you wondering if you have wasted the past five years. I know others here are reassurring you that you haven't, but to be honest, I don't know if you have or not. I know there are certainly a lot of people out there with a BA that they never ever use. HOWEVER, in the big scheme of life, 5 years is a tiny amount of time @MDT. I know it doesn't feel like it right now. I know that right now 5 years probably feels like forever to you. But it isn't. You may very well get a graduate position and be super grateful that you did your degree. Or you may get a job in an unrelated field and in years to come tell other stressed out uni students that it is ok if they end up not using their degree.

I don't know what the future holds for you @MDT, but I do know that despite the fact I spent 12 years at uni and am now living on the disability pension at age 40, the sun continues to rise each day and the Earth hasn't fallen off its axis. I don't know what the future holds for you, but I am 100% certain that it holds SOMETHING.

[Sans911]

@MDT - Thanks for checking in. You had us worried for your safety. We could always ruminate on so many things in our past. If I had of taken this path... I should have done things this way or that.... What if.... How come I'm not attached or not attractive to anyone... And the list could go on. And we've no idea what tommorow will be like let alone our future. A degree is always useful, but how you use it us a bit of luck, persevering and economics.

I understand the shooting in the foot. I've had a 20 year career which Ive felt I've almost thrown away because of my MI.

I now you're super anxious about so many things. But try to live for now. You're graduating soon. That's something to Celebrate. And I hope in time good things come your way, and you have those things that you desire so much

[MDT]

hi @Former-Member

I think having regular 'check ins' on these forums is really helpful for me, so that's a potential way for you and others to help. I always find that it helps to chat over these. I just sometimes think that people aren't listening in the real world and/or on here too. But the advantage of coming on here is that people know what it's like.

[MDT]

hey there @Phoenix_Rising
I really appreciate your honesty. I think too many people try to give me fluffy points about how good things are and how there is an added advantage of having a degree (in real life i get fluffy advice but not on the forums so no offence anyone).
I think the thing that stuck out in my application for that graduate program that I have an interview for on Wednesday is my ability to write and communicate. I have a generalist degree but then as you say it does not mean I can automatically communicate. Unlike a lot of students, I actually work and study to get ahead. I had one lecturer last year who told me very similar to what you've said - where the writing is not up to academic standard for a university student.
Just today I got back a result marked at a credit level, which was what I expected - I didn't feel like I went in depth enough with what I wrote.
University marking is subjective too... so all that has to happen is for a lecturer to disagree with what is written and it won't get a good mark. There are a lot of slackers at universities lol.
I think it is figuring out the 'something' that i am afraid of and worried about. The advantage of doing a generalist degree (for me) is that it certifies my ability. Basically I see my degree as a certificate in 'being able to write and communicate and think' then I am given an opportunity to show that in an interview and hopefully a job.
What is hard for me at the moment is the growing up part... I want to be independent because I have the skills to live on my own.. it's just the financial part of life that seems to be giving me grief. But I guess that comes in time hey?
For what it's worth I guess I won't ever truly know if I wasted my time at uni. There isn't really an answer to that question. I guess a better question to ask is would things be better if I did not go? Well the answer to that is a big fat no. Things are better now than what they would've been had I not gone to uni... or stayed at my other uni and completed that other degree i was doing..
Sometimes I feel like I am complaining over spilled milk (ie doesn't know what to do after getting a uni degree.. complaining about trivial stuff) but they are valid concerns I have about myself..

you are right too.. the sun continues to rise each day and the earth spins on its axis.. remarkable to think about actually. It's also why I have an event horizon as my picture because nature fascinates me.

[MDT]

i cant take this anymore...

[MDT]

@Faith-and-Hope @soul @outlander @Sans911 @Phoenix_Rising

[Faith-and-Hope]

Hi @MDT .....

[Former-Member]

Talk to us, @MDT.